Control Keys are defined in the Module Definition, from the HOST Extensions page. That or in the manifest file of the module (.DNN)

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Chris Hammond
Former DNN Corp Employee, MVP, Core Team Member, Trustee
Christoc.com Software Solutions DotNetNuke Module Development, Upgrades and consulting.
dnnCHAT.com a chat room for DotNetNuke discussions

I think I've figured out what you're trying to say:

1) Create the module definition of your first ascx.
2) Go to Host --> Extensions.
3) Find your module and click edit.
4) Scroll down to "module controls" and click Edit.
5) Enter something unique in "Key" and Update it.
6) Create the module definition of your second ascx...

Only that does sweet FA, it still gives the duplicate key error.

Or did you mean to create a single MODULE for my project, and add multiple CONTROLS, one for each ascx?
If I add them that way I don't get the error, but then how do I add just one control to a page now that one module =  many controls?
If I add two controls to the module, I then can't add the module to a page (the Add Module button does nothing, not even give an error).

Why is this so hard?